So Drives The World Away - a made up tour diary.

Day One - Big Face

Apparently I'm allergic to the Arts section in the New York Times. Having successfully driven through Philadelphia to our hotel (ultimate 'success' being measured by how many stray people we could clip in our careering Town & Country) I had finally put my feet up, and was stroking an image of Malcolm Gladwell. In an instant, my whole face began to tingle and swell. It was upsetting; the image of Malcolm's soothing face and hair was slowly blurring, and finally his kind features disappeared as my eyes closed over. Now in the pitch black of anaphylactic shock, I thought to myself, "That's the last time I wistfully stroke an article in a broadsheet newspaper". And though I said it out loud, I knew I didn't mean it.

vengasad!

Here is the download link to the Twilight Sad/Vangaboys mash up (click on the word 'vengasad' above).... Recorded on my phone this morning. Turn it up louuuuuud!

A jobby

Jobby.
As in 'I done a jobby and it had eyes'. Or as in blog 'number 2'. Yes?... Yes?.... No?.... No.
This little number was created by my younger brother for a Christmas many moons ago. Though not as many as you might expect. I don't want to say too much about it, lest he gets offended. Just wanted to share it with the 'potential world', the new phrase I have rustled up for 'nobody'.
So if a gentleman cries 'TERRIBLY CRASS RACIST SLANT!' on the internet and nobody reads it, does it still have inverted commas on each side? I think it does. I think it does. To make up for this waste of perfectly good pixel, here's an amazing video you may or may not have seen. Who are you, by the way?

My first bloggy...

Hello! And... hello there. Its me, your dad. And mum too. I'm new to this game, but wanted to make sure the content was 100% nourishing from the outset. So here we go. Three pictures of The Reverend Barry Chuckle, dressed as a woman. In weeks to come, when the odd passer-by clicks on the blog because it has the word 'COCK' in the title, it will warm my heart and bad bits to imagine the near instant droop of their face and organs at the sight of this page. So I say WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME to you. I hope to have AT LEAST a 3 week honeymoon period with this shit before I inevitably become bored. However, I will be trying my level best to drop the bad habit that has seen the cupboard fill with 'once used' skateboards and learning books. Speak soon. Skorrrrrt.